I made a cool new shirt! Review of Allied Shirts!

Recently, I had the chance to design my very own shirt through AlliedShirts.com.  The entire process of custom designing the shirt and ordering it was a snap.  After I finally thought of what I wanted printed onto my shirt, the entire designing and ordering process only took a few minutes.  It really was very simple.

Of course, I designed something very chic and classy...

Yes, that is a giant squirrel and yes, that does say, "Eatin' squirrel brains is where ya get your smarts."

There are two reasons behind this shirt.  Number one: I've semi-recently become a huge fan of 'Duck Dynasty' and this quote by Miss Kay just cracks me up.  Who doesn't want a squirrel shirt?!?!

Number two: We have some newish friends that are absolutely blown away by the fact that I hunted and ate squirrel as a child.  They just couldn't wrap their heads around it... so squirrels/me is kind of a standing joke.  No.  I didn't REALLY eat the brains.

But back to reviewing the product.  The shirt itself is very comfortable.  It seems to fit very true to size.  The printing is clear and crisp.  Washing the shirt didn't alter the printing at all.  I'm very satisfied.

As for the website and the design process.  I'm also pretty impressed.  I already mentioned the ease of use, but I also appreciated the choices of products available.  The only negative thing I could really think of is pretty minor and I am probably one of the few people who would even notice/pay attention to it.  There are several font choices for the lettering, but I wished there were a few more.  I wanted something that looked kind of italic and this was the closest I could get.  I was satisfied with how it looks.  I'm just used to getting to choose between hundreds of different fonts when I work on Photoshop projects... spoiled, I know. :)

All in all, I highly recommend AlliedShirts.com!  A custom shirt would make a great gift!  You could create something silly like mine for that quirky person on your list, or maybe a shirt with all of the Grandkids' names for Grandma or Grandpa.  Their custom shirts would also be great for bachelor/bachelorette parties, fundraiser, teams, etc.

Go check out AlliedShirts.com and while your at it, check out their other brands: BuildaSign.com and Printcopia for custom signs and home decor.

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Toddler Talk Tuesday- He's DEAD!

Boy, oh boy! Doesn't that title sound full of Christmas cheer?!?  Well, you've got Brennan to blame.

He's DEAD!

This morning, Brennan was standing and looking out of the bedroom window.

Brennan: Hey Mom!  There's a squirrel running in the snow!
Me: Wow, cool!  He's so fast!

Brennan: Yeah, he is fast.

Still looking out the window...

Me: How does our snowman look out there?

He is now 2 ball of snow lying on the ground with one arm sticking straight up...

Brennan (without hesitation): He's DEAD!
Me: Yeah, he's not looking very good is he?
Brennan: No, he's not... HE IS DEAD!
Me: That's too bad.  We'll need to build another one when we get more snow.
Brennan: Yeah, we will, but this one is DEAD!!

Yep, got it. :)

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Toddler Talk Tuesday- Obviously!

Obviously!-

To start this off, I need to show you a picture of my bedroom wall.  I painted this tree and glued silk flower blossoms to it for a 3D effect...

 The other day Brennan came out of my bedroom looking for me.  He held up a small silk flower blossom and put it in my hand.

Brennan: Mama!  I broke this!  The flower falled down.  It was an accident.

Me: It's ok.  Thanks for telling me.  Let's go look.

Walk into the bedroom and start searching for where this blossom used to be...

Me: Brennan?  Do you know where this flower came from?

In his most "obviously..."-toned voice he slowly responded.

Brennan: From the tree...

Oh... you don't say!  :)

Me: Do you know WHERE on the tree this came from?

Brennan: Right there.  (Pointing to the correct place.)

Well thanks.  He probably thinks I'm the dumbest Mom ever now for not knowing where that flower came from when we were looking at a tree full of them.

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A Late Toddler Talk Tuesday- The Tape

The Tape- 

This story is short but sweet!  Last night at a few minutes after 7:00, I realized that I hadn't set the Tivo to record Dancing With the Stars...

Me: Brennan, I'll turn your show back on in a minute.  I have to tape something.

Brennan runs into the kitchen and starts rifling through a drawer, mostly unnoticed.

Brennan: I got it, Mama!

Me: What do you  have?

Brennan: The tape!  I got the tape for you!

He begins to bring a roll of masking tape over to me.

Me: Brennan, put the tape back.  I don't need to tape... OH!  You are so sweet!  Thank you for the tape!

What a sweet little boy.  He took my request to tape something a little too literally!  :)

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A Very Early Christmas Laugh! Hilarious Photos!

I got an email forward from my Mom this morning that had me laughing out loud.  I'm attaching several of the pictures that were included in the email for your enjoyment....

Can you believe that Christmas is their favorite holiday?

Looks like they'll be spending the money they saved by buying fig leaves on counseling for the kids, instead!  I really don't think this is what people mean by "Christmas Eve"!

This is truly the 'Son of Dog'.

They just figured they'd attempt a bad photo rather than accidentally creating one.

Nothin' classier than a redneck Christmas!

Christmas Camo

Add caption"Kid, is that a balloon or are you just happy to see me?"

If the dog can be this humiliated, let's hope he never has kids!

HUH?

This looked cooler in their heads.

Trying to hard to be a MILF.

They thought this would be easier than decorating the whole house.

The ingredients for some freaky nightmares.

Everyone in their Christmas PJ's.

Santa is being held hostage!  I think I'd just hand over the toys.  The elves will get over it.

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Bulb Syringe vs. Turkey Baster- Explanation, please?

OK.  I need an explanation.

Someone explain to my why Brennan would think it is SO horrible when I use a bulb syringe on him to get rid of the boogies when he is sick, but why it is perfectly fine for him to use a TURKEY BASTER on himself?

Seriously!  Having 

THIS

up your nose is worse than

THIS?!?!

Brennan has his own turkey baster to play with in his little toy kitchen or in the bathtub.  Today, however, he was holding it while we were hanging out on the couch.  I was crafting so I didn't notice what he was doing with it.    All of a sudden he excitedly tells me, "Mom!  I got my boogers out with this pump!"  Wow...  Maybe next time I'LL try the turkey baster on him and see what he thinks then!

Picture credits: Turkey baster- Dimensionsinfo.com, Bulb syringe- Inhishands.com

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Jimmy John's Commercial had me Giggling!

I heard this commercial on the radio the other night and it had me laughing!  I hope you all enjoy a laugh on your Sunday, too!

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A hilarious eBay feedback diagram!

I am on eBay a lot.  I stumbled onto this very funny photo diagram about leaving feedback and wanted to share it with you!  I definitely got a good laugh!

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The Premiere of Toddler Talk Tuesday!

Lately, I've been thinking to myself that I wish I could remember all of the cute and hilarious things that Brennan says.  It seems that memories fade quickly and things that you think you'll never be able to forget fade and fade until eventually the memories are gone completely.

That's how my new post series, Toddler Talk Tuesday was born!  I know I'll never be able to record all of my kids' fantastic comments, but I hope that this way many of them won't be forgotten!  So to kick off Toddler Talk Tuesday, here are "Jesus and the Juice" and "Naptime".

Jesus and the Juice

It is lunch time.

Me: Brennan, what would you like to drink with lunch?

Brennan: Juice and water.

Me: Sounds good.

I go to the refrigerator and find that we are out of juice.

Me: Oh Brennan, I forgot!  We are out of juice.  You'll have to just have water until we get more.

Brennan: OK.  Just have water.

I sit down at the table and we say our prayers- the common table prayer.  After finishing, I begin to talk to Brennan about what our prayer means.

Me: You know- Jesus is so good to us.  That's why we say our prayers; to thank him.  When we say, "Let these gifts to us be blessed", we are talking about our food.  These (pointing to our meals) our our gifts.  It's important that we thank Jesus for our gifts.

Brennan: Yeah, but Jesus didn't have any juice.

Me: (Trying not to laugh...)  No, he didn't this time.

Brennan:  But... Jesus does have juice at the grocery store!

Naptime

After a mini-breakdown at the post office, I am putting the kids back into their stroller to head home.  Brennan is whining and carrying on.

Me:  Enough whining.  We're heading home.

Brennan: SOMEBODY NEEDS A NAP!

Me: Really?  Who would that be?

Brennan: BRENNAN!  I wanna cuddle with Mickey in my little bed and go night night!

So glad that my 2 year old actually asks for his naps now!  That's a change from 6 months ago!

I hope you enjoyed the first Toddler Talk Tuesday!  Hoping to continue this every week!

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Just a Little Out of it at 1:39 AM!

You sure would think that having a digital clock in your bedroom would eliminate any confusion about the time... not so!  Last night, Ryan was on call until midnight and had set his pager on the dresser, where it was partially blocking my view of the clock. 

When Bryleigh woke up in the middle of the night and started crying, I very drowsily glanced at the clock while getting out of bed to retrieve her.  Much to my surprise she had stayed in her crib a lot longer than I expected- it was 3:90 something!  It took me a minute to realize that there is no 3:90.  I looked again, realized that part of the number was blocked- 1:39... that's more like it.  Bryleigh was right on schedule and I was just 'sleep drunk'.  

Nice.

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My Hilarious Little Guy!

Everyday, Brennan is getting funnier and funnier.  I know that all little kids say cute and funny things, but this kid just knows how to get me laughing. 

Just yesterday, I got a text from Ryan that said, "What's for dinner?"  That's what started the funniest conversation with Brennan.  (This story needs a little bit of background information.  Brennan has a book called 'Roly Poly Pangolin'.  There is a line in the book that says, "What's for dinner?  Ants and slugs?  Roly Poly won't touch bugs!"  We haven't read this book in a week or two.)

Me: Daddy wants to know- What's for dinner?
Brennan: What's for dinner? Ants and slugs?  Mama won't touch bugs!

I couldn't believe that he quoted his book!  So funny.  He's been quoting movies lately, too.

A few days ago Brennan pointed out that we forgot to say our prayers before lunch.

Brennan: Say our prayers!
Me: You're right.  We forgot!  Do you remember how they start? Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest- can you say that?
Brennan: C'mon, Jesus!  Be our guest!
Me: (Trying not to laugh)  Well, that works, too.

And speaking of Jesus- the other day Brennan told me that he could hear Jesus outside!  I made sure to warn all of my Facebook friends to make sure they were on their best behavior.

He's also been trying to 'convince' us that we aren't upset with him when we really are by telling me, "Mommy, you're happy..." in the cutesiest voice he can muster.  Tricky little bugger!

This is such a short list, because I'm trying to think of all of his funniest moments off the top of my head.  It is hard to do!  I need to start blogging more things like this so I can share them with Brennan as he gets older.  I'm sure he'll only be funnier by then!

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Oh Boy... A Kitchen Mistake!

I am so glad that this is just a picture I saw on Facebook!  Boy, if my hubby did this and left it for me to clean, we'd have some issues!  Have you ever burned through anything?  I will admit that I let one of our plastic bowls have a run-in with a burner once.  I think the toxic smoke was the worst part!

If this happened in  my house,, I think I would drill a little hole in the back and hang it up in the kitchen!

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Whose Line Funny to Wrap up the Night

If you are like me, you really with that 'Whose Line is it Anyway' was still on tv.  I laughed SO hard at every episode.  I thought I'd post one clip for you all to enjoy!  Have a good laugh!  Goodnight everybody!  I'm off to bed...

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Boobs... A Blessing or a Curse?

This is the story of my life!  I found this here and had to share it with you!  Being that I'm a size 36DDD even when I'm NOT nursing, I can definitely relate. 

1. The Surprise Stain

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

2. The Counter Dilemma

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

3. Airplane Turbulence

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

4. The Motorboating Proposition

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

5. The Built-in Bra Issue

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

6. The Shoulder Strap Attack

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

7. The Dishwashing Dilemma

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

8. Ye Old "Boob Spillage"

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

9. Seatbelt Sadness

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

10. Ruffles!

11. Suspenders!

Via: bustygirlcomics.com

12. Stairs!

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A Mother's Work is Never Done... So True!

I saw this on Facebook tonight and wanted to share it with you all!  Too funny...

 
A man came home from work and found his 5 children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn around garden, The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and no sign of the dog, walking in the door, he found ...an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, the throw rug was against one wall, In the front room the TV was on loudly with the cartoon channel, the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel... She looked up at him, smiled and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world do I do all day?...
 
''Yes," was his incredulous reply.  

She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.'

This awesome photo is property of "Heath Robbins Photography"
✿http://www.facebook.com/HeathRobbinsPhotography
✿http://www.heathrobbins.com/

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What does your morning smell like?

Anyone who regularly reads my blog knows that I like to post a lot of pictures and tell stories about my life, but most often, about my son.  Sometimes these stories are fairly detailed and lengthy, with a lot of pictures.  The post idea that hit me this morning was totally the opposite, but it fits perfectly with the title of my blog, "A Day in the Life of a Five Foot Mama".

As I was changing Brennan's diaper and getting him dressed for the day, here's what was running through my head- "Ahh.... the smell of rank diaper and fruit snacks in the morning."  Many of you are probably smelling freshly brewed coffee or maybe some muffins in the oven.  Well, enjoy your coffee and muffins while this Five Foot Mama basks in the residual odor of fruity poop!

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HE'S BAAAACK! FWA-ZEE-ZEE

Since mid-December, a cherished member of our household has been missing in action.  You're probably already feeling worried for us, thinking that our beloved dog or cat (we don't have a cat...) has run away.  Don't worry- this situation was just a tad different. 

You see, Brennan has this Little People block set that came with toy monkey and zebra figurines.  He carried them around like little buddies until one day, we could no longer find "Fwa-zee-zee" (A.K.A.- Zebra).  We scoured the house from top to bottom searching for Fwa-zee-zee, to no avail.  We assumed that he was still tucked away into some secret little hiding spot and that he would turn up soon.  We also assumed that if we didn't find him, Brennan would quickly move on and forget about Fwa-zee-zee.  NOT THE CASE!

Every night, and sometimes multiple times during the day, Brennan would grab either my or Ryan's hand and say, "Fwa-zee-zee!" while pulling us along on the hunt with him.  He would always start the search in his room, laying down flat on the floor to peer under his changing table, before moving onto other possible hiding spots.  We looked everywhere!  The only logical explanation was that he could have been thrown away (but I went through the garbage before bringing it out just in case...) or flushed down the toilet.  Of course, when I asked Brennan if he flushed Fwa-zee-zee, he just replied, "Flushed!" along with a matching hand gesture.  Where else could Fwa-zee-zee be?!?!  Finally we decided that Fwa-zee-zee was not going to be found, at least not anytime in the near future.  We figure that we'll probably find him on the day we move out of our house, sometime down the road...  Still, Brennan wanted to keep looking for him and we were getting quite sick of looking.

Lucky for us, there was one (and ONLY one) exact Fwa-zee-zee match on eBay, and I quickly decided that it was worth the $3.49 to just buy it and end the hunt.  Fwa-zee-zee just arrived in the mail yesterday, but instead of simply giving him to Brennan, I had a plan.  We were going to make all of the hunting worthwhile!

I secretly sneaked Fwa-zee-zee into the perfect location under Brennan's changing table when he wasn't looking and waited, camera in hand, for the hunt to begin!  The results were pretty darn cute.

Now, as I write this, Fwa-zee-zee lays on the couch next to me, waiting to be flushed played with.  He looks pretty happy to be home!  I know his tiny owner is glad to have him back.

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Three super funny videos! Which one is your favorite?

Hi everybody,

I feel like sharing a funny video tonight... the problem is, when I went to choose one I couldn't decide which one to post!  So here's the deal.  I'm posting three videos and I want you to vote for your favorite.

Dennis Quaid in Starbucks:

Double Dream Hands:

I Ain't Gonna Pee Pee my Bed Tonight:

Which video is your favorite

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A Good Friday Night Laugh! German Coastguard Video..

Hello to all my loyal followers!

The other night I was watching a funniest commercials show and this commercial was shown.  I laughed SO HARD!  I hope you all enjoy!

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Supermarket Salesmanship

This is an email that my Mom sent to me.  I got a good laugh out of it... enjoy!

Sense of Freshness....

A while ago a new supermarket opened in Topeka, Kansas.  It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh.

  Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of  distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.

When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and there is the scent of freshly mowed hay.

 

In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions.

 

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens clucking and cackling, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.

 

The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies.

I  don't buy toilet paper there anymore.

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